25 Valentine’s Day Cards That Don’t Suck

Do you have a date for Valentine’s Day?

I do. February 14.

Which means you have two and a half days to get your shiz together and make an effort in the key of love. Quick, bust out the heart-shaped cookie cutter!

Then again, maybe you’re not the Valentine’s type… who is, really? It’s all so #cutecouple #loveyoubae #vomit.

Hallmark has a lot to answer for.

However… I am generally of the opinion that ignoring it completely is all a bit romantically grinchy. So here are 25 cards for your lover (or dude you want to convince to be your lover) that don’t completely suck. Think of them as anti-Valentine’s cards.

There’s a little somethin’-somethin’ for everyone – from the biology geek to the meat head to the sci-fi fan to the not-quite-your-BF-yet broseph.

Which one will you choose?

(Hint: I might have saved the best till last.)

Let’s get started…

1. For… well, the guy you want to bone.
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2. For the guy who knows he’s batting out of his league.
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3. For the guy that maligns your 50 Shades addiction.
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4. For the guy you know won’t be offended.
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5. For the pretty boy.
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6. For the emoji lover.
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7. For the realist.
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8. For the tech geek.
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9. For the guy you like to molest in his sleep.
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10. For the scientist.
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11. For the blokey bloke.
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12. For the Star Wars fan.
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13. For the on-again, off-again guy.
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14. For the music aficionado.
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15. For the grumpy dude.
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16. For the isn’t quite your BF yet but you don’t want to totally ignore the potential guy.
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17. For the married guy.
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18. For the animal lover.
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19. For the guy that loves pizza more than his mother.
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20. For the guy you’re still having epic sexy times with.
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21. For the guy who hasn’t said the L-word yet.
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22. For the handy man.
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23. For the proliferator of big words.
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24. For your single pal.
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25. For everyone, everywhere.
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